Nowadays, I see many young people put positive affirmations of loving their family and showing gratitude in their social media everyday.
I learned mine from a movie.
Twenty years ago, Sam Mendes, who just surprised everyone today with unexpected Best Director and Best Motion Picture Drama wins at the Golden Globes for 1917, directed one of the most influential movies of my personal life, American Beauty.
That movie taught me not to be a slave to material things, a phase which I went through as a young person. When I first came into money, I would buy Louis Vuitton shoes, Prada bags, Versace clothes and Ralph Lauren shirts season after season after season - and I thought, THAT was THE life!
There's a beautiful scene in the movie where Annette and Kevin fight because Kevin almost spilled wine on her Italian couch which cost a lot of money. He says to her "It's just a couch!"
Years later, I realized all my LV shoes and Prada bags couldn't hug me back when I was in emotional distress. They are beautiful things and I love beautiful things, but they cannot hug me back when I was feeling sad. Just like Kevin, I said to myself, "It's just a fucking bag!"
When Kevin's character was shot in the last scene, seeing Annette's character slump into his clothes, sobbing, moved me so much. I was only 28 that time and I was still this cocky SOB who though the world should revolve around me.
At that time, I did not really show appreciation to the people around me - until it was too late! I knew I had to change that. Papa died a decade before this movie so I know how it is to lose someone very important when I was not ready yet to say goodbye.
So I decided to be nicer to Mama and to all the motherfuckers who made my life difficult. It was not easy but being kinder to people does make you feel better about yourself. When I was kinder and more thoughtful to my family and to my friends, and even to my 'enemies', they responded accordingly - and that was one gift of a lesson that movie gave me.
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